Major Market Merde

UNIMPRESSIVE - here is our new local market:

(Just picture some average apples and oranges.... Our Internet is out until next week and I can't download the photo. Yes, it is 2010....?)

The list of things I will miss about Paris is short and goes something like this:

1)      -Friends

2)      -Local market

3)      -Pierre Hermé

Now, Pierre Hermé delivers outside of Paris, so scratch that off the list. And, if you have tasted the dips from the Greek guy at our local market, he gives number one on the list a go for its money.  This past Saturday, we (Al, Lucie and I) set out to try our new local market, hoping we could cross it off our ‘things we’ll miss about Paris’ list.

Movies usually lie about Paris, but they do get the fabulousness of local markets right. Our old market had over 200 stalls, nearly all of which we tried and tested during the past few years, and the people we bought from knew exactly what we would order and would throw in a free lemon or dip or other treat to keep us happy.  There was the eclectic mushroom man with OCD who had his many kinds of mushrooms laid out in rows that you would not dare touch in fear of disturbing his precise intended layout, but he knew his stuff. And the Italian family with the weird cousin who always made some off-handed comment about whatever we ordered. Or the vegetable stand girl who always said, in perfect English, “Hi, how are you doing?” but did not know another English sentence to save her life. Our favorite was the Greek guy. Actually, he could be Turkish or Tunisian for all we know, but we always called him the Greek guy, and he has some of the best, most delicious feta concoctions we’ve ever tried (in Greece included). Paris market people: you will be missed.

Our new local Lyon market is smaller, by a lot. We are down from 200 stalls to say about 50. But, maybe quality is better than quantity (though we had both in Paris). Here’s how it went: the flower guy did a one-over of me and upped the bouquet price accordingly. You know, the “Foreigner Special” – ie. 50% more expensive. Before handing over the money, I realized this and called him on it. He faked innocence, but we all know that I have just acquired my first MVE (market vendor enemy). Not a good start.

It can only get better, right? Wrong. Who sorts our vegetable order? A half-stoned, middle-aged man (who Al swears was working at the market when he was a kid – I forgot to mention that Al is from Lyon and grew up one street over from where we live now), and he was SMOKING A CIGARETTE! That is right – multi-tasking at its best. He would smoke the cigarette between his lips while he piled up our vegetables, then take a long drag, then grunt (as in ‘what else you want, huh?). Classy.

Moving on… we lined up in the wrong direction at the fish place, therefore accidentally skipping to the front (MVE number two in the making), and the fruit cost a fortune.

So, a recap on the market front. Paris: 1 - Lyon: 0. We’ve got some major work to do here.  Good thing that Super U is just down the street, and even open on Sundays (shocking).

ps. For those of you rooting for Paris, don’t get too excited. When reviewing life in general, Paris is still so far down in the red minus zone that it will be a cold day in hell before it can ever touch Lyon.